Overcomer Series: Letting Go of Toxic People So You Can Love Yourself, Others, & Life

Rainbow Quote

C – Careful to Avoid Infections (Part I)

Infections coming out of our brokenness are caught, and taught only to recycle it again through others. Therefore, infections are toxic to our well being, and toxicity can come through various forms never seeking to enhance one’s life mentally, emotionally, spiritually, or physically. Toxicity is the worldly mindset and its lies talking to you through various mediums; in this post I we will be sharing about negatively infectious or toxic people.   Toxicity may have entered through growing up in a negative environment, through destructive and traumatic events in life, and/or an upbringing heavily influenced by what society says and does. Whatever the case, God desires that you be free from it and adopt His mindset and believe what He says about you over the toxic lies that have plagued your life. In order for us to be free from toxicity and avoid infections, we must come to a place in which we are willing to cooperate with God, not just know His Word, but apply it to our lives.

When I was younger I was very crippled in my personality and spirit through the various abuses. I can remember feeling a sense of freedom when a certain abuser wasn’t around. When my abuser was around, I felt oppressed as they constantly reminded of how I wasn’t good enough or just wasn’t enough in general. They would constantly drill in my head how I would never make it, or if I did I would fail. If I tried to do something, they would find fault with it and humiliate me; mainly in front of others. If I had things that I was ashamed of physically, they would make it a point to share that with others too. I was repeatedly physically, mentally, and verbally abused publically and privately. When I had truth spoken to me through the positive mindset movement I wondered if that could very well be me. I believe the longing to be free and to feel good about myself was a root of God within me that has never let me quit in this lifelong quest.

“for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill His good purpose.” ~Philippians 2:13

In my early years with God, I had need of taking in the truth of His word as there were layers of infection from toxins that needed to be watered down and washed out. I soaked in every chance I could get in the Word and began to have a good working knowledge of Bible verses and their addresses. I needed to take in and believe the elementary truths of the Word so that I can then feed on the Word as solid food and rightfully apply what I learned in my life.

“I fed you with milk, not solid food, for you were not ready for it.” ~1 Corinthians 3:2

The Bible is a manual on life and just like any other manual, once you read the instructions, you must begin to apply it to get the most out of it. Therefore, there came a time when I needed to put some muscle to my meat.

“Don’t just listen to God’s Word, you must do what it says. Otherwise, you are only fooling yourself.” ~James 1:22

Right now, I speak to those who may have been abused and I would like to share that God is stronger within you. If you long to be free and feel good about yourself, believing what God says about you – you can!

“For everyone born of God has overcome the world, and this is the victory that has overcome the world – our faith!” ~1 John 5:4

It is obvious that anyone who abuses you is toxic to your health, healing, and growth as a child of God. But, in order for you to begin to heal properly you have to cooperate with God in the process or it won’t reap the benefits you’re seeking. Some toxic people may not be easy to get rid of especially if they are family.  Some toxic people may be a close friend, neighbor, or co-worker you have known for years.  I have had those too. I had been so used to toxic people that I had them in and around my life with no real knowledge of how to overcome the negativity that affected others through them. I tolerated them and let them negatively affect me which in turn negatively affected my husband and family.  Some toxic people God had me remove completely from my life as their affects bore no good fruit in me. I prayed to God and I was given the word boundaries; some boundaries were temporary and some were permanent.  Either way God made boundaries for a reason.

God placed boundaries around families.

“This was the inheritance of the children of Benjamin, according to its boundaries all around, according to their families.” ~Joshua 18:20

God placed boundaries from the world.

“When you come into the land of Canaan which I am giving to you as a possession, these will be the boundaries.” ~Numbers 24:2

It is OK to give yourself permission to take a breather from certain people. It may not be easy as that may have been your norm for a long time. But, if you don’t fight for your life and peace no one else will. If you want the freedom God has for you then, you need to apply His word and set some healthy boundaries. First, stop giving negative and toxic people permission to speak into your life. There are times when you might be going through some tough stuff. Those are the times that you choose to share your burdens with people who will help to lighten it by lifting your spirits in truth and love, not those who will crush your spirit, making it harder for you to bear the burden. There are times when you might be confronted by a negative person spewing out their negativity and not desiring peace, you can choose to take your peace and walk away. They may not want to claim their peace, but it doesn’t mean that they have to have yours too. You can claim your peace.

“If it is possible, as much as it depends on you, live peaceably with all men.” ~Romans 12:18

There are times when you may have all the negativity fly up in your face and you have no choice but to stay. You can choose to keep quiet and not engage. This, too, is keeping your peace while they’re losing theirs. Jesus did the same thing and He also recognized that they didn’t know what they were doing.

“But Jesus remained silent and gave no answer.” ~Mark 14:61

“Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” ~Luke 23:34

You might ask then, they see they’re hurting us how can you say, “they know NOT what they do”? Most abusers, negative, and/or toxic people don’t know the internal damage that it does to a person. They don’t know how you have to fight to keep yourself from wanting to just go away, disappear. They don’t know how you have to fight through all of those toxic words that have now become your thoughts and they are crippling who God intended you to be because you’ve listened to them for so long.  Those words and thoughts seem louder than God’s voice and words about you. They don’t know that because of the damage and pain they inflicted on you, that it may have caused you to look for love in all of the wrong places because you didn’t receive love from the right places, right people, and in the right way.

As a person who has been abused, I battled many years and still have residual effects from time to time that creep up from the crippling in my childhood.  In my quest to being an “Overcomer” in life, I choose to face it and drain the areas of my life from the infections or toxins that want to linger.  I do this because I want to leave a legacy for my children and teach them the life-saving truths that I did not know in my childhood.  I share my sufferings with you in an effort to help bring some life-saving truths and freedom in Christ to you. God desires that we be free; free to love ourselves, free to love others, free to live, free to laugh, free to heal, and free to enjoy our lives. I share this video below of how God sees you, His precious and valuable child, to counterattack what the enemy has tried so hard for you to never know or forget.

I pray that God would begin to heal the wounds that have been inflicted upon you from your past no matter how deep or how recent they may be. I pray for whole healing to begin internally that externally you would manifest the life that is being reborn inside of your beautiful soul and spirit. I pray that the truths of God’s Word would echo in your mind and hearts, taking root in your very soul and calling them back to remembrance in your hour of need. You are blessed, dear one, and loved with an abounding and healing love.

You are loved,

Laurie

Next Post in Overcomer Series: Eliminating Other Toxins that Cause Infections

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About Laurie Popovich, Pops of Life

Hi! So, happy you stopped by. Stick around while I tell you a little bit about me and my journey. I’m a daughter to Spanish parents and a sister, too! That means I love family, hugs, to share my 2 cents, music, dancing, flavorful foods & coffee. I’m a wife, twice to the same man, in a thrice redeemed marriage. I love deeply because I know no other way and it has filled my life with hope. I’m a believer of the impossible. I’m a mom of 5 beautiful and full of life blessings; but was only supposed to have one. You see, I had cancer; given 6 months to live when our first and daughter was 2. They’re a product of the impossible. I’m a homeschool mom who didn’t think she could teach: first, at all then, at different levels, different styles. I teach in what in my mind was the impossible. I’ve walked through many trials; some that have taken my life in many aspects, including literally. I have overcome the impossible. I’m a spiritual sister and friend. I love to share and encourage others in life to live the impossible. I’m a daughter of the King; a powerful Creator and Redeemer of the impossible – me - and I can be impossible  I love to…love people…encourage others…being a student of life and the impossible …laugh at myself… journal my hopes & dreams & pray to make them a reality… journal my fears & seek to turn them into victories…eat chocolate…cook for many & watch them enjoy the food & fellowship…go against the grain because you never know what blessing is there waiting for you…flirt with my husband openly because I’m in love…squeeze our 5 blessings often because I’m grateful & amazed by them…say sorry often because I make mistakes, stress & well, I’m a mess at times…I run to clear my head…and…I run to God because He’s my source of strength, hope, and love. I’m not where I was and I’m not where I’m yet going to be; I’m under construction deeply desiring to enjoy the journey. I know you have a unique and exciting one too, and I can’t wait to learn and enjoy the journey with you! Grateful, Laurie
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